[Conrad retrieved a map from an Iraqi's soldier's butt]

Sgt. Troy Barlow: Conrad, you've washed your hands like ten times.

Conrad Vig: Lord knows what kind of vermin live in the butt of a Dune Coon.

Chief Elgin: Why do you let this cracker hang around with you, man?

Sgt. Troy Barlow: He's all right, man. He's from a group home in Dallas. He's got no high school.

Conrad Vig: Don't tell people that.